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Softy?

Discussion in 'Dad Talk' started by Rrrobert, Jan 7, 2017.

  1. Rrrobert

    Rrrobert Member

    My question is simple. which is preferred, a "softy" dad that is emotionally open with their children, or the stereotypical "muscle" dad, that tackles everything like a brute?

    Other dads are the extremes of the two, but I guess I'm somewhere in between. moms and dads, which do you think is better?
     
  2. Peachkins

    Peachkins Member

    Balance is everything, ain't it? I wouldn't want to deal with a softy dad because being a parent does need some level of Machiavellian ingenuity. But I wouldn't want a brute either who wouldn't know emotions if it bit him on the nose. But we are all just going along with what life throws at us, so I think that it is more realistic that you can be one or the other depending on the situation :D
     
  3. Amber Lee

    Amber Lee Member

    Maybe a little bit of both for sanity. :D

    I imagine a softy dad who is always emotional being a boring dad and a brute dad that looks like he's creating a monster within him. So I'd choose a little bit of both. :)
     
  4. MrHandy

    MrHandy Member

    Yeah, a bit of both. My wife and kids have no complaints so far. I can level with them when problems arise and talks are needed, but when discipline is needed, I can be very very strict.
     
  5. Rrrobert

    Rrrobert Member

    its just that some of the guys think I've become a stranger to them, that I don't hang with them as much anymore. I admit, I miss the weekend poker matches, but I can't leave my children by themselves. :/
     
  6. MrHandy

    MrHandy Member

    You should set time for them too, bro. Most in our group of friends (we're 16 guys) are married, so we don't mind bringing the kiddos to our get-togethers, which usually is just eating out and catching up, or playing basketball. Once a month though, we have men's nights, and I ask my wife to watch over the kids, or have them watched by the grandparents.
     
  7. Rrrobert

    Rrrobert Member

    yeah, I guess that's a good idea. bros should have each other bros' back.
     
  8. we men are really simple. even if we get separated for a few months, years even, but when we all get the free time/chance to bond, we always go all out - above and beyond for our bros! :)
     
  9. iamevallain

    iamevallain Member

    My husband has always been on the softer side. but Im pretty sure he'd be a great dad! sure, he got teased before, but he just want's to go against the stereotype. :p
     
  10. Amber Lee

    Amber Lee Member

    Same sentiments from my husband. He thinks he's become an alien to his friends because he spends more time with the boys than they "boys" but yeah, catching up once in a while is really good and healthy so what he usually do is he invite his friends over for bbq and drinks so he can still watch over the kids and the boys are free to bring their kids too. :)
     
  11. I like soft dads mainly because they are very caring and very touchy, very slow to anger and all but I think it's not healthy if they do that all the time so there has to be a little bit of being "macho" from time to time, more like being a man in the house who gets to fix things. :)
     
  12. Honeylette

    Honeylette Active Member

    Haha, I like this. This is what my husband and his friends say too.

    My husband allows me to go out with the girls for nights out, and I allow him to spend time with his friends as well. We just have rules, we can't get drunk (this was before my pregnancy), no smoking, no drugs, and no cheating. Just clean and good hangouts.
     
  13. Rrrobert

    Rrrobert Member

    well thanks everyone! I guess I'm an alright guy/dad. with that said, I gotta check with the wife a bit later, me and the boys are going for a road trip next month! lol
     
  14. well I let my wife go out as well, but what she does is completely up to her, there aren't any rules. I think its enough when she knows that I completely trust her, much like how she completely trusts me! :)
     
  15. A big yes to no cheating. Haha. This is a mandatory rule for everyone who wants to have a happy marriage. :)
     
  16. Leiah

    Leiah Active Member

    Good to know that you're a cool dad ;)
     

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